I did something this week that I haven’t done in a long time. I took every “to do” swimming around my brain and put it on paper (well, in a Google doc).
Once I was done, I was left with a 2-page list of things that need to get done in the near term (and some longer term items, too) and a much clearer head. I was actually amazed at how much lighter I felt once I wrote everything down. Seriously – suddenly I feel this gap where I’ve had what has felt like one of those scroll bars in Times Square. No more sending myself one-line emails to remind myself to do something and then losing them in the shuffle. No more thinking “I need to do this and this” while I’m in the middle of doing something else, which inevitably just makes me forget what I was trying to do in the first place. (Have you ever opened your laptop and suddenly forgotten why you did so? Welcome to my life.)
I’m making a conscious effort to be more present, to do what I’m doing without thinking of 900 other things I’m supposed to be doing. I’m not sure how long this will last, because I know new things will pop up, but I’m loving the feeling of having everything written down in one place for now. (I think it goes back to my elementary school days, when we were taught to write every homework assignment down and check it off in red pen. Love that feeling of checking things off!)
If you know me IRL you know that I like to keep busy. I like when I have a million things to do, because I have a hard time sitting still. But I’ve been making some life changes lately that are forcing me to slow down, and I’m actually enjoying it – much more than I thought I would, anyway! More on that later…
What brought this on? I was reading a blog post from Erin, a blogger I’ve followed for years, and realized that life isn’t going to slow down. She’s a wife, a mom, a small business owner, a blogger, and an entrepreneur, and things sound like they’ve just gotten busier as the years have gone on. I’m in total agreement that “having it all” is kind of bullshit. It sounds romantic and all, but at the end of the day, do you really want to be burning the candle at both ends for an extended period of time? I mean, that’s where the whole “it takes a village” thing comes in, isn’t it? I’m learning to outsource, to ask for help, and to bring in my tribe when I need it. I’m not sure if that makes me the antithesis of old fashioned, but I see nothing wrong with having a family and loving them, but also doing what you want for yourself.
You only live one life, you know?